Saturday, November 30, 2019
I just had a small piece of apple pie at 6 a.m. this morning. It was a cold slice of apple pie, not very sweet and the crust still is lovely and flakey enough. The coffee maker has brewed me a good 6 cups of coffee to least me a full day; awake and ongoing. As I was waiting for the fresh brew coffee, I took out the roasted chicken that I made for Thanksgiving dinner and deboned it. The chicken bones will go into a big pot for making the chicken noodle soup broth and half of the meat will share with a chicken pot pie. I tried to be creative!
How are you doing? I tried to keep things going on a smooth flow and trying not to rush all. I see things different and calmly and believe that would have to do with the maturity and growth in a better life perspective this year.
In October, I have had another birthday (it comes every year, you know); the first year in the round of forty I did pretty well, I didn't get held back to be 39 (ha); pass the probation and entered second year of forty. I can't tell you how much I am enjoy this lifetime of mine! Nothing is real a big deal, but learning the acceptance of life and feeling grateful and cherish life and being able to be with love ones. Have a steady job that I clock in and out and not to mention that my job fulfills my days and it is meaningful.
I was spoiled by having a blueberry chiffon cake and a dine out at a fun Korean restaurant. I do miss and wish having time to bake the birthday cake, but with the lack of time and energy now. Things just got crazier in real life and we tended to go for easy and outsourcing for what could be done quicker. S drew me a very sweet birthday card as always! I have keep them in my safes, where all these drawings and things she made for me over the years. I am still touched by the words that she had in the card. Finally it is really the light shine in our life that she is slow settled in this crazy costal life. I am sure once the time has come that she will fly out the safe nest with her strong wings to places that she wants to be and go. Now, I still got some work to do; more training on her independence and decision makings. Parenting is never ending, but I am doing alright as far as I know of; we can talk like adult and debate on things and it is alright that we don't agree from each other every time.
It was probably the end of October, when Fifi was telling me that mama is unwell. Mama have had some infection on her leg and caused some swollen, redness, and pain. It was uncleared to me since everyone described mama's symptoms differently; and the trouble is that she refused to be seen by the doctors that she didn't know and postpone her office visit. Finally, she was taken to the hospital for outpatient visit. Thank goodness, it was not too late to treat the cellulitis, doc said it almost life threatening if she came in another few days late. It was hard for me not being able to be there! I was like a mad chicken trying to figure it out things on the other side of the world. I soon checked at my PTO hours and realized by the second week of November I would have 7 days PTO, plus two weekends that means a total of 11 days. I was planning to use this time to take S on a mini vacation, but I just felt strongly to travel to see mama. Soon, I booked the oversea ticket.
On the Wednesday of second week of November, I left work half an hour early and came home to finalized the last bit of packing. I knew I wasn't going to be gone for a very long time, but I tried to be sure the apartment is decent clean before I left. I boarded a midnight flight and it was over a 16 hours straight flight; for the first time that I felt that home is so far away. I was anxious, maybe. I watched six movies and had three cups of coffee. Oh, I didn't bother to sleep; the girl who sat next to me twisted too much and it was not comfortable. I can't blame on her, the seat is small and we all were exhausted and trying to get to our destinations.
When I landed, it was five a.m. there; after pick up the luggage, I got on the airport shuttle train to the speedy train station; on the way there stopped by 7-11 to get a rice ball and a cup of coffee. I was lucky and hopped on the 7:15 train to my hometown and it has had been over 24 hours since I closed my eyes for rest.
Mama is doing much better, her leg where the infection caused has a large dark marking on the skin. We sat down to chat on the first afternoon I arrived, along with papa. My parents always are happy that I am home to be with them even though for a short time visit. I know I have been giving these unconditional loves from them ever since and it is my time to return these to them.
I've gone to the open market to get fresh grocery for our hot pot dinner on the first Saturday I arrived. My brother's little family came, so we all can see each other and chat. We ate for the longest hot pot dinner time! We literally devoured a whole cabbage and more food! It was always fun to see them and just listen to nieces talking about schools, that reminded me how my S does at home! I have had few breakfast dates ( It is always been special time) with papa and coffee time with mama. Fifi and I took our nieces out for breakfast date, so we get to hear the girls talk more.
The one week visit went so quick, I really didn't have much time to do much nor sleep. My brother took me to the train station on the second Saturday; I headed to another city to visit my bestie from college, it has been another few years we seen each other. She is still the same her; funny and kept me laughing so hard. We were trying to staying up the night to chat, but seriously; we are both just too old to do so! The following day, I headed to Taipei to visit Erin my childhood friend; we've always trying to see each other when I am there or she came to NYC. She was diagnosed with rare cancer when she was in her early 30's and she is staying strong ever since.
Oh, the trip was packed with visits and chats and families! I am feeling settled with mama and papa's health; they are taking care of each other. It feels like yesterday they were still young with all the strengths and energies, and now they are carrying sliver hairs and wrinkles faces. They walk much slower and take their time for everything in no rush! I miss being with them and began to consider a future moving back home to be with them when the right time comes.
Every time, when I travelled away, I see my S grew a bit older! My little family picked me up at the airport and it was a Sunday late night. Everyone was starving! We headed to a late night restaurant before headed back to the apartment. Then we unboxed all the gifts from the families; it felt Christmas came early for us! I went back to work the Tuesday after I returned.
Every since I returned from the trip, I have been in a strange sleep hours and exhausted from not being able to sleep at the right hours. By 4p.m. I feel like I could use a good sleep to catch up all the sleeps that I missed and it has been 2 weeks now. I have been trying to fix the irregular hours of sleep ever since and it gotten worse. Oh, I just need to relax about this, right!
After the unexpected trip this year, I am ready to settled in for awhile now! Today is a busy cooking day; chicken noodle soup and a chicken pot pie for the upcoming week. And the annually carmel corns making. It will be the first weekend that we don't need to travel anywhere in a long time! I miss being homebody a lot more than you think.
I know, I haven't talk about the patchworking. It hasn't been all very exciting! It would sounded an excused for not having time to sew, but it is so true! I now understand and hear all of you who have a full time job and trying to be passionate about the patchworking. It is really challenge some of the days. The studio has lightly layered with dust since my last visit and few fabric bundles that came in last few months still stay unopen and the penny square cuts are still waiting to be put together. I have not come up with a resolution on how I can manage to sew daily and making it into a commitment. Eventually it will all work out! Crossed fingers for some weekending sewings now on!
Thank you for another great year here; you've come here from time to time and read about this life and all. I really wish I could write and share more bits and bobs, but sometimes I am trapped in real life events; the good kind and some days might be not the highlights, but it helps me grow.
Before I take off here, wish you have a happy holiday season with families and friends! I will see you in 2020. I promise sharing good patchworking and you know my S is turning 16 next February. I am trying very hard to start the 16th birthday quilt here and also a mini holiday celebration.