After coming back from visiting papa who slipped down and broke his backbone the end of the last year. I took another few weeks off from job hunting. The job hunting started in early January, I sent out lots resumes and waited to hear something and of course, nothing was heard. The ongoing searching jobs and submitting resumes taken up lots of energy and time. There were time, that I took time off to sew and write and to give myself a break from the process (thank you for being here). There were time, I had though maybe the phone is not working, so I would text a friend and just to check if the phone is actually work ( and it is working). The job searching process is long and it drains out confidence and brings anxiety. I knew it wouldn't be easy since I live in a competitive city even job opportunities are widely open. I keep on trying and keep optimistic about it!
Nothing was heard in February! So that made the month of February very long and gray! I wish it was pink allover, but it was not! I actually was depressed and started have more doubts in myself and of course that inner self conversation began all unhealthy and questionable. I was blessed! Have friends started calling and checking on me and see where I am at with things! Then beginning of March, I took time off from the job search and focus on sewing and positive self-dialog. It felt pretty encouraging with all the work that I could have done in the studio without distraction and brights me up.
Around mid March, I started getting phone calls and emails for interviews (what????) I know, they just came all together around the same time. I had numbers of phone interviews and in person interviews. I have had rejections follow up, but more opportunities came along! I felt dizzy after all the roller coster rides. Right after the last posting, I was invited for a second interview and spent time to prepare for it. I knew I have a good chance and needed to take extra mile on this opportunity. I didn't think the second interview went that well! You know, you just kind of know how it went after met with the directors! But then I received the offering phone call two days later and was hired! It just happened! So, I have been working and training last three weeks full-time and yes it takes time to feel myself again! I am just tired and too anxious!
My body is exhausted after getting off the bus from work as I have been getting up at 6a.m.. When I came home, all I want is sit and read a page or two of the book. Make myself a cup of tea. Around 6p.m. put on the apron and start prepare supper and semi-tidy up the space. I tried to reground myself a bit and getting things organized, but mentally I am just not there! I knew it is going to get better and improve as the time goes!
I haven't step in to the studio for three long weeks and totally miss the sewing time and everything. I am thinking I still remember how to sew and cut fabrics, but it requires time to pickup that productive sewing mojo.
Today has been a productive day at home for a long time; cross out to-do lists and getting organized! The shoulders are feeling lighter as I check off the promises list as well. This is the behind blog life that I am working with and finally feeling comfortable to share with you.
As the weather gets warmer and daylight gets longer, I am hoping to maybe sit and sew a bit in the studio before prepping the supper and I just knew it takes routine and self effort for that, too!
and Thank you for staying around...